Love for Travis is something that has a fated quality about it, created or matched by a deep passion that involves him as if under the influence of some sort of potion. Often despite his better judgment, Travis is drawn down and into a dark well of emotional fascination, towards some outcome he apparently has no control over unless he resists it from the first. Because of all this, Travis has to be very careful that such attraction is not just a dalliance, a mere Fancy.

...a subtle and compelling charm that draws the object of his desire to him powerfully and irresistibly.
...an aura of sexual confidence that, one way or the other, lives up to itself.
...a totally focused and uncompromising attention to the person of interest, rather like a snake fixing its prey.

...a sinister underlying intention that, when detected, leads to a fight for survival and falling out.
...his perverted way of satisfying questionable needs and appetites, and then scuttling off when things become more real and intense.
...a sexual or emotional overkill that if not resisted at the outset can destroy any love or finer feelings that the other person (or even Travis) might have.

...powerful types, who are often in need of emotional deepening or transformation, along with Travis himself probably.
...relationships that involve intrigue, secrecy and/or the breaking of sexual or social taboos.
...relationships that claim him body and soul.

...blandness and a fear of plunging into each other's emotional depths.
...anyone who plays it too safe and is unwilling to explore the unexplored.
...relationships which bind him but do not emotionally fulfil him.

...one reason could be that he is unprepared to commit to a relationship of any depth of meaning for he knows that it will demand painful confrontations with his most private fears and obsessions.

Aloneness could alternatively take the form of involvement in a relationship for material or practical reasons but which is lacking any soul connection or emotional satisfaction – and so Travis is alone in a psychological sense. Often, money may have become a substitute for love in that Travis is manipulated by it in some way.

Conversely, his aloneness could take the form of feeling deeply for someone who cannot or will not match such depth. The reason behind this is that Travis is pledged at some deep level to remind the other person of the importance of the more profound human needs and longings.

In all of these cases, the long and lonely night of soul that Travis endures will firstly be reminding him of this spiritual truth. Who feels it, knows it.

Travis has an enthusiastic need to have fun with his mate or intended, but this could find him falling into the habit of being emotionally indiscreet.
Travis has strong instinct for moving to find a more positive place or direction, but sometimes this could amount to troublesome restlessness, itchy feet and the other side of the hill always looking greener.
Travis is naturally inclined to be easy-going and philosophical, but at times can lean towards being amoral or rather sanctimonious.

...for his opposite number with his great warmth and enthusiasm, giving them a boost to their own faith and joy in the process.
...and relaxes the other person with a manner that expects freedom of movement as well as allowing it.
...with an innocent and trusting manner that brings out the best in his mate.

...with off handedness or dismissiveness when his partner or intended does not want to play his game.
...in an irresponsible or even outrageous fashion when he feels too restricted or obligated.
...gullibly or opportunistically to any offer that appears to be better than what he currently has going for him.

...someone who is expansive and cosmopolitan, and for whom travel, abundance and sophistication are the style.
...someone who is outgoing and exciting, probably with strong opinions and beliefs.
...anyone who is playful and risk-taking.

...relationships which promise far more than they deliver, showing him that indulging himself or the other person, born of a want of ease, makes for being a poor judge.
...situations that have no meaning and drive him to despair until he discovers what he believes in for himself.
...a relationship with someone who is mentally or emotionally unstable.

But it is through these situations that Travis develops emotionally.

...it is most likely because he has found a relationship - or merely the idea of being in one - too confining for his wandering and seeking soul. This wouldn't be a problem at all, unless another part of Travis feels the need for the security that a relationship can bring.

And because of this inclination of his to want both security and freedom within a relationship, it is just as likely that he finds himself stuck with someone for reason of needing the one (security) but not enjoying it at all for reason of not getting the other (freedom) – that is, Travis is alone but with someone.

The reason behind all this is that he has been seeking a set of requirements in a partner that are contradictory at best or hypocritical at worst - and if Travis is as honest as he likes to think he is then he will know this.

In other words, Travis shouldn't expect or promise security when there is still some roaming to do. If Travis really is alone, then it is because he needs to look for and find a more philosophical approach to relationship or a more spiritual reason for being in one. Until he does so, Travis will be naively expecting the other person to be more understanding than is presently possible for them.

Effectiveness for Travis is achieved through establishing what his values and principles are, and so he is then able to keep a just balance between what he wants and has a right to and what a significant other wants and has right to. The great danger is that such fair and considerate behaviour can make Travis indecisive and err in favour of granting that significant other more than is their due, then resenting it, with the subsequent disharmony driving him or them to Anger.

...a well-mannered and considerate approach, that initially evokes a pleasant response from his partner or intended.
...charming, skilful and discreet courtship rather than a seductive kill.
...elegant and fashionably aware sexual advances.

...a half-heartedness that has at its root a fear of moving from a notion of sex or love to the real thing.
...a half-heartedness that is down to a fear of entering into a state of challenge or conflict.
...emotionally insincere sweet talk that fails to impress.

...civilized, harmonious people and social scenarios that have well-defined or subtle boundaries of acceptable behaviour.
...hot-headed, wilful individuals who challenge him to be more forceful and decisive.
...someone who fits in with his social life and who has friends or interests in common.

...awkward scenes where he is not sure what is expected of him or given no opportunity to take the lead himself.
...extended conflicts as a major ingredient of a relationship.
...anyone who is incapable of adapting to whatever social environment in which they might find themselves.

...it is because he has been too busy trying to find or live up to an idea that he has of love and sex as opposed to what they actually are in reality. Part and parcel of such an idea – or ideal, more like – is Travis' fear of having seen, or having to show, a more raw and self-interested side to himself.

The myth that one has to be well-behaved in the form of some kind of paragon of sexual and romantic virtue can make Travis so nice and considerate that it hurts – and eventually leaves him with no-one to prove it to. What is seriously lacking here is the honest and straightforward emotions that attract and keep the interest of mere mortals. In the end, and especially while Travis is alone, he must discover what he truly feels rather than what he has been led to believe he is supposed to feel. In this way Travis comes to realize that he simply cannot please a partner all of the time, and in every way, if he is to satisfy his own desires.

Travis wins when he generously uses his sense of justice, weighing up both his own and the other person's situation, but loses when this turns into indecisiveness.
Travis wins by radiating harmony and beauty, but ultimately loses when he is merely being nice all the time.
Travis wins by being fair and diplomatic, but loses when he just sits on the fence.

...an aura of pleasantness that gives his partner or intended a feeling of being someone special.
...an impression of social ease, and of knowing the right faces and places.
...an air of aesthetic awareness or social harmony, or a display of artistic ability.

...with a gloss of pleasantness that is purely for effect, and is in great need of sincerity.
...with his dependence on others in general rather one person in particular, which he does to maintain his own feeling of being of some social worth and desirability.
...by treating everything and everyone but a significant other with grace and consideration.

...relying solely on his looks or style - which amounts to using superficial means for superficial ends - rather showing some emotional involvement and commitment.
...taking his tactfulness and willingness to compromise to the point of becoming a nonentity.
...overemphasizing the polite or glamorous side at the expense of being real or substantial.

...through doubting or being unaware of the value or attractiveness of his inner being, whereas expressing or exposing it would strengthen it.
...when having to risk being disliked or disapproved of by his significant other, even though being true to himself would mean that his mate would then be also.
...when his 'muck' is raked up, despite the fact that this would make him feel more relaxed and natural.

But sincerely admitting to any or all of these, commands or regains respect for him from the other person, and can dramatically improve the relationship itself.

...it is most likely for one of two reasons. The first reason for being alone is that Travis is having to discover himself as an independent individual rather than just being someone else's other half - which is like being a two-dimensional being, a human mirror and nothing else.

In order to do this Travis will have to surface what appears to be some quite anti-social feelings and ideas. But this is okay as long as he sticks with it and fashions such crude ore into fine steel.

The second reason could be that Travis holds the belief that he is too odd or unacceptable to be in a relationship.

This is as maybe, but being locked into such an incestuous and subjective relationship with himself would prevent him from noticing that everyone, including a potential mate, is 'weird' too and also has something to hide that they want discovered or uncovered by and with love.

...being right or wrong, and so he takes great pains to ensure that he is in possession of the facts and so consequently he can be trusted as a straight talker with an intelligent outlook.
...being accurate and precise, so he looks into the details of his own and his partner's or intended's issues, separating the salient from the irrelevant, and delivering clearly his findings.

...the wood for the trees and so he has to spend a lonely night in the forest. This means that, technically correct though he may be, Travis' significant other is only going to hear him when they feel valued by him for more than just being able to appreciate his fine sense of logic.
...that his mate or intended sometimes just wants to hang loose, be silly or downright emotional - and not to have to just make sense.

And these are reasons why Travis can fail to communicate.

Travis has the goodness to treat everyone as deserving of care, but he should avoid being slushy and doting.
Travis has the morality to uphold family values and integrity, but should guard against this becoming restrictive and resentful.
Travis has respect for feminine qualities such as emotional generosity and receptivity, but should not allow himself to be too subjective and put upon as a result.

...creating a familiar, comfortable and hospitable environment which enables them to grow and prosper.
...protecting their weak parts from the oppressiveness of the world at large, thereby giving them a chance to find their own feet.
...instinctively tuning in to their most basic, but sometimes subtle, needs.

...mollycoddling and indulgent, to the point of preventing development in his mate.
...protective and 'understanding' of his partner or intended, possibly in a bid to have his own shortcomings overlooked.
...aware of his significant other's weakness rather than their strengths, and, albeit unconsciously, playing upon them, even drawing comfort from them.

...that safety and comfort and sustenance should be the birth right of everyone.
...that Mother Earth and Nature are sacred and should be revered as such.

...someone who puts politics and business, or any external non-emotional issues, before personal feelings and sentiments.
... care not being taken of people if they cannot take care of themselves.

...that to truly help the individual, at times one has to be tough on them.

...it is because he has had to get left with only himself for comfort. In this way he can become aware of how it is far more difficult to care about himself than it is to care about someone else.

If this is incomprehensible to Travis, then unfortunately he still have some way to go towards understanding why he is alone and lonely when he is such a kind and considerate person. The main reason is that Travis has tended to bestow all manner of help and support upon the other person when really he was in need of doing it for himself.

The other person may have lapped this all up, which was felt like appreciation of Travis - or they abused or rejected it, which would confirm feelings of him not being worth caring about.

Also, Travis could forgive others because that would give him permission to forgive himself indiscriminately - 'nothing wrong with me' sort of thing. But there is something wrong: Travis doesn't care about himself enough! And until he does he will be alone or feel alone.

Travis builds or needs to build a relationship where he and his partner have well-defined roles, but to avoid this becoming cold, rigid or too business-like.
Travis has or needs the discipline to take on material and professional responsibilities, but not become resentful if he feels that he is having to carry too much.
Travis takes, or needs to take, time to establish the purpose and position of a relationship in his life, but to guard against this descending into something that amounts to mere formality.

...dull and meaningless relationships which are maintained merely for the sake of appearances, status, or avoiding being seen to fail.
...someone who is seriously incapable of managing life in the material world - which could well be Travis himself.
...someone who wants to control him and keep tabs on him all the time, or conversely, someone who Travis feels he has to control and keep tabs on.

...grasp the fact that the only mistakes in life are the ones that one does not learn from, and that he should come clean and make a fresh start.
...prove that he can be the one who structures a relationship, and/or accept the fact that he is the one who needs structuring.
...be more in control of himself, and make his boundaries clear and firm for himself.

...someone who has their own firmly established sense of duty, discipline, responsibility and professional position.
...someone who is old enough to be mature and know their place in the world.
...someone who is objective and self-contained enough to keep emotional issues in perspective.

...someone who has yet to find out the meaning of duty and responsibility - especially if they are kidding themselves in this respect.
...someone who has more growing up to do than their actual age merits.
...someone who is easily swayed and too dependent upon his approval.

...it would be for either of two opposing reasons. The first would be if he an overly emotional type and so he would be learning to get a clearer idea of himself as a separate identity, and to contain himself rather than be contained by someone else.

The alternative reason for being alone would be quite the opposite in that Travis had made himself too self-contained to the point where no-one could get near enough to him to be actually with him in the emotional sense.

Yet another reason, which could spring from the first two, is that Travis has become cynical about relationships altogether, and cannot see any possibility of one ever working. Of course, keeping himself to himself would ensure this, which is like trying to make an omelette without cracking the eggs.

So, when alone, in the first case Travis could said to be establishing a strong enough shell to contend with someone getting close to him, or alternatively, he must learn to allow his shell to be broken into, or at least, cracked a little.

Saviour or Victim

Travis approaches life with a view to improving the quality of it in some way, and so he an eye for detail, and more to the point, an eye for what is flawed, unclean, untidy or unhealthy. Consequently, Travis is almost constantly on the go; there is always something or someone that needs seeing to from where he stands.

This means that Travis is likely to attract someone who falls into the category of 'what needs seeing to'. So, a significant other may be vague, unkempt, absentminded, weak, or in some way in need of practical attention - or at least, that is how they'll seem to Travis.

And this is the point, because he can make a rod for his back with all manner of lame-duck, hopeless case, addict or invalid becoming his mate - or workload rather - simply because Travis seeshisopposite number as something in need of his attention.

His opposite number's response to this will be to be even more vague, unkempt, etc. for Travis is only too willing to take the strain. But if Travis dropped his critical gaze for long enough he would see that his significant other is showing a way to be more accepting and laid back about life.

Laid-back or Chaotic

Travis' need for things to be 'just so' masks a fear of collapse and confusion. Put more accurately, his shadow is actually a profound doubt that life and his partner will be alright without his constant attention, especially to those details.

Unless Travis owns his shadow and then begins to find that a lot of the time he just should go with the flow, he will find it increasingly hard to trust the fact that, in life, some things just work themselves out in their own way and time.

As if to show Travis that he can no more control his mate than a sailor can control the sea, the chaos can leak in by taking the form of him being particularly messy in one area of his life, and quite indiscriminate in his choice of relationship. Travis needs to pick out what it is in his own attitude and behaviour that finds it hard to leave things to their own devices - and then let go of them.

A mixture or purity and 'anything goes' would be a shorthand if somewhat contradictory description of Travis' ideal relationship. Unconditional with distinct no-go areas would be another.

What all this amounts to is that he is attempting to find that perfect relationship, and the nearer he gets to it the more he appreciates that such a thing is a paradox - perfect love includes a love of imperfection.

And the further he gets from it the more impossible it seems. The answer is to keep working at it until he has distilled that blend of discernment and acceptance.

…it is simply because he priced himself out of the market. Being more than a bit of a hermit, Travis is more likely than most to get left on the shelf - out of choice, he would probably protest. Indeed, he may well like it that way, but he would have to be sure that he wasn't just hiding from his own shadow - an impossible thing to do.

More to the point though, Travis is inclined to find no-one quite right because he feels, consciously or unconsciously, that there is some deeply-seated flaw of his own which he has classified as untouchable or hopeless. Not so – just simply in need of practice!